Statistically, children of divorce find themselves much more alone than children in intact families, because the parents [37] have less time and energy. Parents need to work longer hours to make a living. They invest more in professional development and also revert to the courting period.  In the game, we have created an experience of loneliness and “hitting rock bottom”.

After the boat race episode, the hero’s boat is swept away and he finds himself in the snow. The hero walks on ice …. falls into a dark pit….   falls deeper and deeper until his fall is stopped by a cave that appears on a completely dark screen.  The cave is inhabited by a bitter, lonely, and aggressive worm, who is at the same time very direct and open.  He speaks freely of his heartbreak, about his abandonment and his need for love, warmth, family and security.

The worm demonstrates that bullying and aggressiveness are just ‘reaction formations’ to the lack of these needs that are so basic.  He longs for contact and makes no bones about it, serving as a sort of mouthpiece for the experiences that both the player and the hero avoid mentioning.  Some of the dialogues transmit the feeling directly with the seriousness called for in this painful situation. Some use an “eyewink” and humor in order to somewhat dissipate the pain.  For example:

Moose:  “That’s tough man, I guess you’re very lonesome tonight then.  I know I would be if I were stuck in this cave.”
Ellis:    “But you ARE stuck in this cave.”

Moose:  (hysterically) “Oh my god! I am?” (small pause while info sinking in)”…I’m so lonely…”(starting to sing the ‘police’ song) “So lonely… So lonely… ”

In part, the loneliness could be handled by achieving a sense of belonging and of social support.

A recent study [38] found that neighbors and friends can provide very significant emotional support for adolescents going through parental divorce.  It appears that adolescents from divorced homes tend to be more aggressive, use alcohol and drugs more frequently, and externalize more delinquent behavior.  They also tend more to depression, suicidal thoughts and images of low self-esteem than youngsters from intact families.

In the game, the hero has to go through a process of searching for alternatives that will improve the worm’s “home”.

The hero emerges from the ice cave onto the snow fields, where he meets a group of penguins, meant to symbolize an affiliation group, such as family, social group, sport group, a group of siblings, neighbors, relatives, youth movement members, etc.   The hero goes through a process of being accepted by the group and it is the player who has to choose between the different alternatives.  In order to be accepted he goes through a process of belonging and yet maintains his individuality, something that is so crucial for adolescents.

The episode takes place in a milieu of rap-style singing.  The penguins say a line and he has to choose one right one out of the alternatives.

A similar process is undergone by the penguin rap-singer that has separated himself from the group and the hero convinces him to belong –

Moose:  “Listen, we could REALLY use a hand here… How about it?”
Punk:    “No.”
Moose:  “Oh, come on.”
Punk:    “Well, when you put it THAT way…No.”
Moose:  “Please?”
Punk:    (cynical) “That’s even more persuasive.”
Moose:  “Ok, you want persuasive? How about you help them because they’re your friends and friends HELP each other.”
Punk:    “The first one was better.” (end)

Part of the fear of belonging is anxiety around abandonment [39], which is created by the separation. There is also a high level of caution, carefulness and guarding needed lest one should be hurt again.  In the continuation the dialogue hints at this.
The penguin rap-singer Punk belittles the penguins’ genuine desire to help the hero and the following dialogue takes place:

Moose:   “They’re not THROWING me, they’re helping me get out of here.”
Punk:     “Well, isn’t THAT ironic, talking me into joining just so you can LEAVE.”
Moose:  “Actually, I’m just trying to get you where you BELONG, so that I can get to where I belong.”
Punk:    (faking snoring sounds)
Moose:  (annoyed) “You know, now that I’ve MET you, the fact that the group wants you back just makes me appreciate them even more… (under his breath) AND question their SANITY a little. Nevertheless, they WANT your friendship and I’m SURE that deep down inside you feel the same.”
Punk:  “You’re RIGHT… I ALSO think they’re insane.” (end)

The power and creativeness to cause Punk to join are in the player’s hands.

Continue reading “Part 14 – Mother’s Home and Father’s Home”

Go back to “The Psychological Angle – Main Menu”

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[37]  Wallerstein, J., Lewis, J.& Blackeslee .S. (2000). The Unexpected Legacy of Divorce .New York: Hyperion
[38]  Journal of Marriage and Family (2002), pp. 1024-1037
[39]  Journal of Marriage and Family (2002), pp. 1024-1037

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